Monday, Thursday, Friday, Whatever Hangover: The Sucker Bowl
Sometime before Thanksgiving my friend Reedy and I discussed the losing teams of the NFL and what they would be doing after the season was over. A good many of them have been the butt of jokes not only on here at the Hangover but on other sports sites as well. Thereby we have concluded that these losers need to be winners.
We comprised the Sucker Bowl.
The Sucker Bowl is an 8 team, double elimination format that will commence on Week 15 (Dec 17th). If this were to begin today, here's what the bracket would look like:
(#1 seed having the 8th worst record in the NFL as of the end of the season, #8 the worst record period. Standings as of Week 12.)
#1 Titans (3-8)
#8 Texans (1-10)
#3 Arizona (3-8)
#6 NY Jets (2-9)
#4 Baltmore (3-8)
#5 San Francisco (2-9)
#2 New Orleans (3-8)
#7 Green Bay (2-9)
The tournament itself would be simulated on Madden 06 for the PS2 with roster changes occuring if a player is either out for the year with an injury or replaced by the team (none of this questionable, probable crap). The finals will be recorded and a short highlight will be shown here of the final game. Seeds for the tourney will be decided based on final record, tiebreaker going to personal opinion.
Ok enough with that fantasy crap. To the games please.
But first, thank god I don't have to talk about Tommy "Soup Kitchen" Maddox.
ok now to the games.
Colts send for On-Demand pirate robot ninjas - Colts had a feeling that the Steelers didn't have a chance. Soon after the first play from scrimmage from the Mastercard All-Fantasy Team (aka Peyton Manning), in which they scored with a long TD pass, the Steelers had a feeling they weren't going to win this. To put it in perspective, the Steelers are Jean-Clude Van Damme and the Colts were Tong Po. This time, Colts played more like Tong Po on crack. Tong Po on Crack 23, Billy Blanks 7
Minnesota to Cleveland: Rushing Game WHAT!? - Cleveland's running game gets crushed by the resurging Vikings. Maybe all Dante Culpepper needed was a vacation. Or at least a Carnival cruise. Paul Edinger and Marcus Robinson 24, Phil Dawson and Dennis Northcutt 12
Sub Club Game of the Week - Tennessee and San Francisco. You want the good news, San Fran? Here ya go. Jose "Smalls" Cortez has a job again kicking for the 3rd team this season this time with San Francisco, his former team. You want the bad news now? Titans outscored San Francisco 21-0 in the 4th quarter. This is starting to be a running joke. Tennessee Chicken Club 33, Toasted Meatball Sandwich 22
Dallas and Denver get crazy with the 7s in regulation, Jerry Jones arrives on sidelines, Cowboys lose in OT - Someone's getting fired for Christmas. That's all I'm gonna say. Mile-High Rugby Team 24, Lumbergh's Choke Squad 21
Most Worthless Player - Kicker Jay Feely of the New York Giants who had three, count them three chances to kick a winning field goal for the GEEEEEEEEE men against Seattle in Seattle. S men remain undefeated at home while Feely gets tied upside down to the goal posts.
We comprised the Sucker Bowl.
The Sucker Bowl is an 8 team, double elimination format that will commence on Week 15 (Dec 17th). If this were to begin today, here's what the bracket would look like:
(#1 seed having the 8th worst record in the NFL as of the end of the season, #8 the worst record period. Standings as of Week 12.)
#1 Titans (3-8)
#8 Texans (1-10)
#3 Arizona (3-8)
#6 NY Jets (2-9)
#4 Baltmore (3-8)
#5 San Francisco (2-9)
#2 New Orleans (3-8)
#7 Green Bay (2-9)
The tournament itself would be simulated on Madden 06 for the PS2 with roster changes occuring if a player is either out for the year with an injury or replaced by the team (none of this questionable, probable crap). The finals will be recorded and a short highlight will be shown here of the final game. Seeds for the tourney will be decided based on final record, tiebreaker going to personal opinion.
Ok enough with that fantasy crap. To the games please.
But first, thank god I don't have to talk about Tommy "Soup Kitchen" Maddox.
ok now to the games.
Colts send for On-Demand pirate robot ninjas - Colts had a feeling that the Steelers didn't have a chance. Soon after the first play from scrimmage from the Mastercard All-Fantasy Team (aka Peyton Manning), in which they scored with a long TD pass, the Steelers had a feeling they weren't going to win this. To put it in perspective, the Steelers are Jean-Clude Van Damme and the Colts were Tong Po. This time, Colts played more like Tong Po on crack. Tong Po on Crack 23, Billy Blanks 7
Minnesota to Cleveland: Rushing Game WHAT!? - Cleveland's running game gets crushed by the resurging Vikings. Maybe all Dante Culpepper needed was a vacation. Or at least a Carnival cruise. Paul Edinger and Marcus Robinson 24, Phil Dawson and Dennis Northcutt 12
Sub Club Game of the Week - Tennessee and San Francisco. You want the good news, San Fran? Here ya go. Jose "Smalls" Cortez has a job again kicking for the 3rd team this season this time with San Francisco, his former team. You want the bad news now? Titans outscored San Francisco 21-0 in the 4th quarter. This is starting to be a running joke. Tennessee Chicken Club 33, Toasted Meatball Sandwich 22
Dallas and Denver get crazy with the 7s in regulation, Jerry Jones arrives on sidelines, Cowboys lose in OT - Someone's getting fired for Christmas. That's all I'm gonna say. Mile-High Rugby Team 24, Lumbergh's Choke Squad 21
Most Worthless Player - Kicker Jay Feely of the New York Giants who had three, count them three chances to kick a winning field goal for the GEEEEEEEEE men against Seattle in Seattle. S men remain undefeated at home while Feely gets tied upside down to the goal posts.
posted by Gary at
9:32 PM
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